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I am Christian, a wifey and a mommy...but mostly I am just a big fat hairy nerd!

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Saturday, August 29, 2009

Day 241 (day 3 / week 35)

I've been doing a lot of thinking since I posed the question, "did I blow it?" and you guys really helped me out with your responses. All in all I decided that I was going to count it, but I started thinking about the why, as to why I would count it. I came to these conclusions that gave me the mental closure that my brain needed, when I continue to think about things, long after I thought I had resolved them (lol).

1) You guys are right, I don't have a typical desk job. I work 12 hour shifts and more than 1/2 of that (6 hours) I am walking around, pushing pulling and using my large muscle groups (legs) for support so that I don't hurt my back. I know I am getting a workout because sometimes I feel winded after a transfer. The day before yesterday was, in my opinion, more of a physical day than I usually do have at work.

2) When I wasn't working, I was willing to substitute exercises and would count that as exercise done. I would do heavy cleaning, wear my HRM, turn it on, and count that. I would also mow the lawn and count that. I dance with The Monkey Boy and even count that. Why is that any different than substituting a physically demanding workday?

3) I keep saying that I need to listen to my body, and so why is a workday any different than a non workday? I was physically exhausted when I got home. That tells me that my body worked hard that day. I don't know if it was because I was on my 4th day and I didn't get 8 hours of sleep the night before (very well could have been) but I was also sore the next day, that to me, is my body telling me that I worked out, whether I consider it a workout or not.

Thank you for all of your insights on this. I really did want to see how someone else viewed it, because, well, I am biased. It's my life and my resolution, and I know I tend to be hard on myself as some of you have mentioned *cough Loree* *cough Erin*. (I'm just teasing you guys, ((Hugs))) :).

Today I got out kind of late today (8am), and walked for 4.15 miles in an hour an 15 minutes, and cooled down for about 10 minutes (85 minutes). I am very excited because yesterday was my very first payday so I am going to go buy a new HRM. Mine is just....done. I don't really know why it gives me wonky readings but today was my last straw with it. It was 92-96F when I walked and the last time I did this, I burned about 1500 calories in the same amount of time and my HR was well over 135 during the bulk of the time. This time my HRM said my HR was 82. And then 112. At teh very end of my walk, it jumped to 147 so I don't know what's up with it. I also don't like the fact that I can't adjust my new weight on my HRM--I burn calories differently at 190 than I did at 215, when I originally programed it. So this is my reward to myself, for my first paycheck. I want to get some more hand weights too, because The Monkey Boy peeled off the coating off of one of mine. lol (silly kid). The other thing I want to do for myself is get a new hair cut. I am also very excited about this :).

BTW I woke up this morning and the swelling went down completely. My toe hurts a little, but nothing like it did last night. *whew*

Sorry for the long post! Hope you all have a great weekend! Make it count! Anything goes!

I can do this. I am a star.

5 comments:

Miriam the Mommy said...

I just read the last three posts in a row (catching up - sorry) and after I read the 'Did I blow it?' I was so like, "Oh, MAN that is going to just eat her up inside because of the emotional impact of a possible break" - like I bet you had trouble falling back asleep, right? Right?

You're a perfectionist, and therefore one of the hardest lessons you have to learn on this world is... to let it go.

Sounds like you're on your way! And yes, it's not that you didn't exercise one day - you just forgot to have the intention one day - but you actually DID do it, so you are still kosher, as we like to say. :)

You should be SO proud of yourself!

momstheword said...

Glad your toe feels better and wow, I can totally understand how that news would upset you about Jacyee.

I don't know if you have a contingency for days where you might be sick or throwing up or something, but exercise is exercise.

Just because you may not work out as hard as you do when you're feeling good does not mean you didn't exercise.

Even walking to the bathroom and throwing up is exercise! So on the days way you may not feel well, listen to your body and count it good, girl!

MissEllen said...

I'm glad to hear you worked through this. It seems that the transformation your undergoing is as much in your thought processes as it is in your physical body.
Your on such an amazing journey. Thank you for candidly sharing such a personal life event. I am learning a lot from you.
The tricky issue for women seems to be learning to love ourselves, and fighting our negative inner voice.
You have certainly given me food for thought. Think I'll go chew on it for awhile. :)
love, Ellen

loreejo said...

I have a friend that says her tiny littlve voice (TLV) is a SCREAMER! I agree, taming that is the hardest thing but Melissa you sure seem to be doing a lot to get yours to pipe down. xo

Ellie said...

I've been sick since last Wednesday - which has been the longest I've gone without exercising in...probably at least four years?
And today I found out I have pneumonia. So I'll probably be taking a little more time off.
I'm not letting it get to me though, because there are some things in life you just have to take as they come.