It's time for a break

I need a break. I think that I bit off more than I can chew by trying to do 2 years of exercise in a row, and I think it's just too much. I talked to my family and they all agree. I just have so much going on, and instead of relieving stress, it's become a stressor. Over the past year I have learned what it takes to make a positive lifestyle change, and how to have the dedication and determination to do it.

This "break" doesn't mean that everything will stop. It means that I need to give myself the chance to do it on my own, and not because I have to (that's the difference in my mind with this resolution). So yesterday, I took a much deserved break. I didn't exercise. I exercised for 365 days in a row and then some. I proved to myself that I can do it, so I will never say to myself again, that I can't. It hung over my head like I was forgetting to do something all day, but at the end of the day, it felt good to let go.

Yesterday I still watched what I ate, and I wouldn't really call it, "watching" because it's just what I do now. I am so used to knowing to look for the numbers and that's a good thing. It's apart of my lifestyle change, and I don't find myself craving calorie filled junk anymore, like I used to. Knowing those numbers makes it hard to enjoy the food. I also want to focus more time on the Sparkpeople plan. It teaches some great stuff for lifestyle change, and I just want to do the whole thing over again, w/out any added disruptions. I think I had too much on my plate to fully absorb the great info (I learned a lot, but I can learn SO MUCH more).

I also still plan to keep up the no sugar/no soda thing. It's so hard with the no sugar, but easy when it's not around (it's those "around" times that are a pest!), and I will still continue to talk about that, because so many people struggle with it too, but the no soda thing I think I have in the bag. It's more like a soda/strange chemicals ban.

Anyway I didn't weigh myself or do my measurements, like I said. Sorry. I spent a lot of the day trying to recover financial damages (so stressful). In 2009 I started out at 215lbs and at my lowest I got to 183. I have since gained 10lbs but I'm not upset because it will eventually be lost too. I now weigh about 193lbs. Having this goal made me obsess over my weight more so than usual, I think, because it was measurable by that number. I still plan to lose more weight this year than last, but I won't and can't obsess over it because I have other priorities that are more important.

Work and exercise is hard. All of you working peepz out there know this. I was spoiled at the beginning of my resolution because I was a stay at home mom. I had A LOT of time on my hands, more so than now (even on my day's off because I'm playing catch up). Once I started working, the exercise thing got hard, and I stopped enjoying it. It became a chore.

Anyway, I still struggle and am still going to blog when I can, but I think I need a rest from blogging daily, and trying to catch up on the days that I didn't blog. It's just too much.

I hope you all are well! Thank you again for all of your support!

I can do this. I am a star.